How Kind Acts Can Radically Change Lives
Here’s a summary of this week’s sermon:
How Kind Acts Can Radically Change Lives
Have you ever been the recipient of a random act of kindness? Perhaps someone ahead of you in the coffee queue paid for your drink, or a stranger gave up their seat for you on a busy train. These small, seemingly inconsequential actions can have a profound impact on our lives. But why is kindness so powerful? Why does it resonate so deeply within us?
During a recent lunch with colleagues, an unexpected act of kindness from a stranger not only covered our meal but left us with a lingering sense of wonder and gratitude. This experience, simple yet profound, served as a reminder of the transformative power of kindness. The truth is, kindness does more than just brighten someone's day - it can radically change lives.
The Spiritual Fruit of Kindness
Kindness is recognised as a fruit of the Spirit - a direct outcome of our growth in relationship with God. As we develop spiritually, kindness becomes more than just an action. It becomes a part of our being, influencing not just what we do, but who we are. The Bible underscores this transformation, noting that "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control" (Galatians 5:22-23).
The Cycle of Kindness and Wholeness
Kindness is often misconceived as merely performing good deeds or random acts of generosity. However, its implications run much deeper. Kindness has the unique ability to promote wholeness in both the giver and the receiver. This wholeness is not about perfection but completeness - a sense of nothing missing and nothing broken.
When we delve into the kindness of God, we find that it is intended to lead us to repentance. This repentance is not about fear or judgment; it's about turning towards something infinitely better. It's a pivot from the paths that lead us astray to the path that leads us home. Through kindness, we see a reflection of God’s character—His love and compassion in action.
Transforming Lives Through Kindness
The story of the Good Samaritan illustrates this perfectly. In this parable, a man beaten and left for dead is ignored by those who you’d expect to help. Yet, he is shown compassion by a Samaritan, a person from a group despised by the man’s community. This act of kindness - crossing cultural and societal barriers—highlights the true essence of what it means to be kind: it's a behaviour intended to benefit others, regardless of their background or circumstances.
This narrative challenges us to re-evaluate our own perceptions of kindness. It's not merely about avoiding conflict or keeping the peace at any cost. True kindness involves stepping into difficult situations with a heart of compassion, aiming to bring healing and benefit to others.
The Benefits of Being Kind
Research suggests that acts of kindness can increase our happiness and life satisfaction. Moreover, they can reduce stress levels and promote physical health. This aligns with the wisdom of Proverbs, which tells us, "Those who are kind benefit themselves, but the cruel bring ruin upon themselves" (Proverbs 11:17).
Thus, kindness is not just a moral good - it's a practical good. It improves our lives and the lives of those around us, creating a ripple effect of positivity and transformation.
Embracing a Lifestyle of Kindness
How then can we become more kind? The journey begins not with a grand gesture, but with a willingness to allow the Holy Spirit to work through us. It involves seeing ourselves and others through God’s eyes and acting on that vision with acts of genuine compassion and care.
As we engage in these acts of kindness, whether large or small, we participate in something divine. We become conduits of God’s love and agents of real change in a world that desperately needs it.
So, let us choose kindness. Let it be our mission, our practice, and our lifestyle. By doing so, we do not just change individual lives - we have the potential to change the world. Choose your kindness day. Choose to be kind to everyone you meet, and watch how radically it can change lives, including your own.
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Matt Edmundson: [00:00:00] Welcome to this week's Crowd Church service. We are a digital church on a quest to discover how Jesus helps us live a more meaningful life. We are a community, a space to explore the Christian faith, and a place where you can contribute and grow. I want to invite you to connect with us here at
Crowd Church and there are a few ways that you can do just that. Firstly, you can engage with crowd from any device during our live stream. And if you're up for it, why not invite a few friends over and experience the service together? Church is all about connecting with God and connecting with others, and one of the easiest ways for you to do that is to also join one of our mid week groups where we meet online together to catch up and [00:01:00] discover more about the amazingness of Christ.
You can also subscribe to our podcast called What's The Story? It's the story where we deep dive into stories of faith and courage from everyday people. More information about all of these things that I've mentioned can be found on our website at www. crowd. church or you can reach us on social media at Crowd Church.
If you're new to Crowd or new to the Christian faith and would like to know what your next steps to take are. Why not head over to our website, crowd. church forward slash next, for more details.
And now, the moment you've been waiting for is here, our online church service starts right now. Wow, good evening, welcome to Crowd Church, [00:02:00] who've we got beside me today on the live stream, you'll be pleased to know, it is Matt Edmundson. My beautiful wife.
Sharon Edmundson: Hi everybody. I'm just chuckling slightly because as the introduction was playing he was talking along with it because he knows it so well.
Matt Edmundson: I've heard it so many times, right?
Sharon Edmundson: So I had double Matt speaking to me.
Matt Edmundson: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Sharon Edmundson: We'll just leave it as double Matt. Ha! Ha! I don't know what to say,
Matt Edmundson: don't know what to say. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Sharon and I'm married. So you know, this will be why there'll be the husband and wife jokes going up throughout the live stream.
Anyway, warm welcome to you. Welcome to Crowd Church for your first time with us. Warm welcome to you. And of course, if you are a regular, then a warm welcome to you guys as well. We are streaming live on YouTube. We are on Facebook. And we are of course now on Instagram as well. So wherever you are watching us, be sure to say hi in the comments.
Be great to hear from you. Let us know where you're watching from. Because, we're just jamming the chorus, start that sentence again, we're [00:03:00] genuinely curious, aren't we?
Sharon Edmundson: And a bit nosy, yeah.
Matt Edmundson: Are you curious or are you nosy?
Sharon Edmundson: Oh, a bit of both, yeah, definitely.
Matt Edmundson: Where's the line? I'm not sure.
Sharon Edmundson: Who do we have with us so far?
Matt Edmundson: In the comments we've got Matt Crew, the intro needs recording again. Andy's in the comments, Peter is in the comments, so good evening to everybody. What's this? Mega congratulations to my United Women on winning the FA Cup Final. Fair play to you, but I am going to say congratulations to the women's England team, under 17s.
Sharon Edmundson: Oh, great.
Matt Edmundson: They're winning. They're winning. They're doing really well. Hats off to you.
Sharon Edmundson: Great.
Matt Edmundson: Hats off to you. Yeah, absolutely. Go support the England women's under 17s. Rebecca Dowse is in golf. She's a legend. Absolute legend. So yes, they're winning, which I'm very excited about. Not that this is a football channel.
Sharon Edmundson: No, and I really don't understand football, so I'm starting to glaze over a little bit. Moving on swiftly. Move on quickly, yeah. Welcome
Matt Edmundson: to you today. We are talking, [00:04:00] do you know what we're talking about today? Oh, it's me, isn't it?
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: Talking about Say that again.
Sharon Edmundson: Kindness.
Matt Edmundson: Kindness, you have to say it louder so it goes in the mic.
Sharon Edmundson: I was just slightly hesitant, I was like, I think it's kindness, I listened to it earlier so I should know, but yeah, the memory's not playing at the minute.
Matt Edmundson: The memory's not playing. Peter says, nosy nothing wrong with a healthy interest. Exactly,
Sharon Edmundson: yes. Healthy interest, I like that. Would you incur?
Matt Edmundson: Concur?
Sharon Edmundson: Yes.
Matt Edmundson: We like Peter. He's a legend. So yes, warm welcome to everybody in the comments. Today we are talking about kindness. You've got double Matt today. Unfortunately, I'm terribly sorry, because I'm doing the talks just the way it's worked out with the schedules that I'm hosting. Normally, we try and do it where somebody else is hosting when I do the talk, but it didn't quite work out.
So yeah, you've got me doing the talk. We're talking about kindness.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: And somehow I've got to tie this into wholeness. Now we've been [00:05:00] talking about the fruits of the spirit, right? And we've been looking at this whole thing about spiritual health. We've been talking about the fruits of the spirit, what happens to you when the Holy Spirit works through you, right? That's how we would define the fruits of the spirit. Yeah, we've got all of that going on. Miriam's in the comments as well. Hi, Miriam. Hi, Miriam. Another legend. Say hi to Miriam. Miriam's on YouTube. So yeah, say hi to Miriam. But yeah, so we've been doing this spiritual health thing, talking about the fruits of the spirit, what happens when the Holy Spirit works for you.
We're on the topic of kindness. Oh, yes, we're going to get into that. So what's going to happen? Why don't you, they're going to have enough of my voice, you tell them what's going to happen.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, so we've got Matt talking about kindness. And then after that, we're going to come back and discuss the talk and pick up on any comments that you make.
So throughout the talk, do put your comments in. If you've got any examples of where you've received kindness or given kindness, or just any thoughts that you've got about the talk, chuck them in the comments, and we'll hopefully pick them up after.
Matt Edmundson: And for our American cousins that might not know what [00:06:00] chuck means, just chuck.
Put them in the comments. I'm just translating. So yeah, check them in the comments, lob them. Lob them in the comments. We will see you in there during the talk. But yeah, Sharon, I'll be back after the talk. So I'm just looking for the, there we go, always looking for the talk button on the keypad.
So we're gonna play the talk now. We'll be back for Conversation Street. Don't go anywhere. Grab your notebooks, grab your pens, because this one is I found actually quite a challenging talk. This whole topic of kindness, you're going to find out why. I'm going to quickly switch to you. You can introduce the talk.
I'm going to get changed, change location, sort my hair out, and then I'll be back to do the talk. Here we go.
So the other week I was having lunch with some colleagues in a cafe catching up about a new brand we are going to be launching soon in brackets just for context if you don't know I run my own company as well as being part of crowd so here we are chatting away eating some [00:07:00] good food having some fantastic conversation as we usually do but this for me turned into an unforgettable moment because The bill, the food bill, was paid for by a stranger.
Now, to this day, I do not know who paid it. I don't know why they paid it, but pay it they did. And not just for me, for all three of us. Oh yes, which was amazing. I was the recipient of a random act of kindness. It was a beautiful thing, too. Being kind, then, it seems to have this sort of Amazing ability, the power to transform an ordinary moment into something really quite extraordinary.
So today, guess what we're looking at? Kindness. Oh yes. Which is one of those words that I think can elicit all kinds of emotions in us. Now the Bible tells us that kindness is a fruit of the Spirit. In other words, it's something that God [00:08:00] brings about in us and through us as we grow in Him. And start to become whole now.
All good stuff, right? So let's look at it. We're gonna ask, what is kindness? Is it just about doing good deeds or is there more to it than that? How does kindness actually make us whole, given that we're talking about wholeness? Probably a good question to ask. We will ask why. Kindness has such a powerful impact, not just on those who receive it, cause we all, makes a lot of sense, but actually also on those who give it.
Oh yes, that's coming. And then finally we're going to ask how can we become more kind, which I think is a really dangerous question, but that's just me and we're going to get into all of that. But before we ride into the danger zone, Love the 80s pop reference there. Name the movie in the comments if you know what I'm talking about.
But before we head into the danger zone, I want to look at the kindness of [00:09:00] God. Because this is church after all, so let's look at the kindness of God. Paul is one of the key writers of the New Testament, right? And he wrote a letter to a chap called Titus, who was his spiritual son. And in that, he said this about himself.
He said, we lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God, our savior appeared, he saved us. Wow, that's a great phrase, isn't it? When the kindness and love of God appeared, he saved us. Now, that word saved, he saved us. What does that mean? It carries the idea of soundness and wholeness.
In other words, when the kindness and love of God appears, he makes us whole, nothing missing. Nothing broken. Wholeness is the kindness of God in action. I think that kindness is God's secret [00:10:00] weapon that brings about change in our lives. And it's not just me that thinks this. Actually, Paul thought this too, which is where I got the idea from, not going to lie.
Paul wrote this in a letter to the Roman church. He said, God's kindness is intended to lead you to repentance. Which is a really powerful idea that the purpose, the reason behind God's kindness is repentance. The reason God is kind is repentance, which is all about change. Repentance just means to turn around, we're going one way, so we turn around and we go the other way to repent.
That's what it means. It's about turning around from what was holding us down, and in this case, Paul, when he was talking to the Roman Church, was talking to them about sin, and being really judgmental of other people. He's telling you to turn around from that. And go a different way, go a God kind of way.
Why? Because God has been kind to you. [00:11:00] So it's about turning towards something, I think, which is infinitely better. Repentance is not turning away from something out of fear. Like God is mad at us. So I think this idea that repentance is inspired by the overwhelming kindness of God. God is a beautiful thing.
It leads you to turn away from things that keep us broken and brings you to a place of wholeness. The kindness of God in action. Love that, not gonna lie. So just what is, I love talking about this stuff. I genuinely do. I get really excited. What is God? Kindness. Before we answer that question, what I want to do is understand what kindness isn't.
What is it not? Because I think there are some misconceptions out there about kindness, and in understanding those, I think we'll get to understand what kindness actually is. The first misconception I see out there is that kindness is often confused with self indulgence. Let's take the idea [00:12:00] be kind to ourselves, which is a phrase I hear a lot, often tied with the idea of things like self compassion and self care, probably being the most well known phrase, and I get the intent here.
Behind it. I really do. It even sounds right when we say it because self care, being kind to ourselves, we're often our own worst critic, aren't we? Being overly judgmental and harsh on ourselves, which I don't think is godly at all. So I do think self care in many ways is actually a basic responsibility before God, but I don't think it should tip over into obsession with ourselves or actually neglect of others as this creates a conflict with the biblical principles of self denial, stewardship, and the prioritization of loving others, something we should probably talk more about.
Self care can, I think, tip into self indulgence and it can become about finding that elusive, Comfort [00:13:00] based lifestyle, which I don't believe is what faith should be about, which is all a bit ouch, isn't it? Being kind to ourselves then, that can become an excuse, can't it? Which we don't want. We don't want that excuse for a lifestyle which is in conflict with the plans that God has for us, which repentance.
Being kind to yourself is not about Accepting those things that God actually wants to free us from or change in us. But it is about changing how you think about yourself. Kindness is seeing yourself as God sees you. Being kind to yourself is thinking of yourself the way that God thinks about you. And when you do this, honestly, it opens up the door for repentance, for changing your direction in life, learning from our [00:14:00] mistakes and bringing about God's transformation and wholeness in us and through us.
But the reality is to do that may actually make us uncomfortable. At least for a season. So being kind to ourselves is not always about comfort, it's not always about being comfortable, it's not about accepting those things that God wants to change in us and it's not about self indulgence. And I think we can also confuse kindness with something else.
The avoidance of conflict. How many of you know what I'm talking about, right? Mainly because I think the opposite of kindness is often seen as meanness, and so to be kind, we avoid situations that could make us look mean. So what if I define kindness simply as a behaviour intended to benefit others?
That's it. Kindness is a behaviour intended to benefit others. [00:15:00] So the opposite of kindness is not necessarily meanness, but rather a behaviour that is intended not
When we behave in a way that doesn't benefit somebody else, we're not being kind to them. If we want to be kind to somebody, maybe, just maybe, the best thing that we can do for them is to confront or to challenge. Maybe that's the benefit that we're bringing. Sure, now, hear me on this. I'm not saying it has to be like this.
All the time. There are some people that need to hear that. But I don't think that kindness is about keeping the peace at all costs, or sidestepping difficult conversations, or ignoring injustice. Actually, being kind is more about how you deal with conflict, rather than the avoidance of conflict itself.
And we see this, don't we? Case in point, the life of Jesus, he was confrontational in many ways. But at the same time, he was the kindness of God personified. He confronted [00:16:00] in a kind way because kindness is a behavior intended to benefit others. Kindness is about wholeness and not just about keeping everyone comfortable.
Why does kindness have such a powerful impact on others and on ourselves? To answer that, there's an old story about a guy who was lying in a ditch next to the road. He had been robbed and practically beaten to death and left there to die. He was unconscious, he was pretty much naked, and in a bad way and a long way from anywhere that could help.
He was the victim of a horrific and violent crime, but the story doesn't end there. It goes from bad to worse for him, because people start to walk down that road and they see him, they notice him, but they don't do anything. To help him, one of whom was even a priest for some reason, the three people that walked past him did not want to [00:17:00] help.
None of them wanted to be inconvenienced or get involved with something that they shouldn't get involved with. They were not being kind and the very people that should, they were the very people that should have been kind, but they weren't. And it's easy, I think, as we hear that story, to get angry. And I think that's actually something of God in us, that kind of anger rising up when somebody should have been kind, but wasn't, that's maybe why Jesus told this story, which we've come to know as a parable of the good Samaritan.
It was a good Samaritan that pulled this guy out of the ditch and paid for his medical care. Now, the important part of this story is the kindness came from a Samaritan who, They didn't just own a telephone line here in the UK or a bunch of charity shops. They were actually a race of people who were despised by the Jews at the time of Jesus.
Now, Jesus was talking to Jews. Okay. They despised the Samaritans and yet it was a [00:18:00] Samaritan who was the kind stranger in the story. To bring this matter home. I want you to imagine that you are the Good Samaritan. You walk down the road and you see someone in the ditch that is from a group of people that have done nothing but spew hatred towards your people, that have oppressed them in some way.
Maybe they have, I don't know, Nazi tattoos on their arm. Maybe they are a bully from school or that person that went out of their way and knowingly had an affair with your partner. Basically, they are a person that has wronged you in some major way. They are lying there in the ditch. They need your help and you see them.
Do you help or do you walk past? Jesus here is helping us understand that kindness is the outworking of the love of God. Kindness is a behavior based on love intended to help others, to help our neighbor. It's powerful stuff, [00:19:00] isn't it? Jesus goes on to ask this question. He says, what do you think? Which of the three became a neighbor to the man attacked by robbers?
The one who treated him kindly, the religion scholar responded. Jesus said, Go and do the same. Bingo! Right there. Go and do the same. Go and be kind. Look beyond the superficial, the tattoos, the memories, the hurt and the pain and be kind. Now, Matt, this is easy to say, but it is hard to do, right? But this is what happens when the Holy Spirit brings about the fruit of kindness in us and through us.
It's what happens as we start to become whole. You cannot, I don't think, According to scripture, be a whole person without being a kind person. You cannot be whole without being kind. So what about the Samaritan? Was there a benefit for him in all of this? We know that there was a definite cost when we read the story.[00:20:00]
Cost him money, cost him time and effort and actually probably in forgiveness. But was there a benefit to go along with this Same level of cost. Research has shown that when we are kind to others, our own happiness and life satisfaction actually increase. That's a beautiful thing. And our blood pressure and our cortisol levels, which is a hormone directly correlated with stress they decrease.
That's another beautiful thing, right? All good stuff. And not actually at all surprising, because as you would expect, the Bible does have something to say about this. It says in the book of Proverbs that those who are kind benefit themselves, but the cruel bring ruin upon themselves. So we can see from the Neuroscience.
And the Bible and probably, you know what we know and have experienced that kindness is one of those things that transforms both the receiver and the giver win . So if you are not feeling [00:21:00] happy in life, rather than waiting on someone to come and be your white knight in shining armor, why not figure out why God is telling you to be kind?
And watch what happens. Your journey to wholeness is your journey in kindness. So that's quite a revelation right there. So how can we actually be more kind? That's a big question, isn't it? I'm aware that for many of you watching this, you may have rarely experienced kindness first hand, and the sad truth is, if we haven't seen kindness, if we haven't experienced kindness, I think it's hard to actually be kind.
It's easy to be unkind. We just repeat what has been modelled to us. So how can we become kinder people? The answer lies not within our own strength or in our own power, But I think in opening ourselves up to the healing of the Holy Spirit and experience His [00:22:00] kindness, the kindness of God, His wholeness in our lives.
The ultimate act of kindness was Christ on the cross, taking our place. Spiritually, we were the ones lying in that bed. Ditched by the side of the road. We were the ones that were in a bad way, and Jesus was the Samaritan. We despised him. The Bible says we hated the name of him and we mocked him for years, and we still do in many ways.
But he was kind and he heals. Our hearts and our wounds. He pays the price for us, and it is God's kindness that leads us to repentance, to change, to turn around and find wholeness. When that grace of God, his kindness and action heals and changes us. We start to become like Him and we start to become kind because He is kind.
Jesus put it this way. He said, I tell you, love your enemies, help and [00:23:00] give without expecting a return. You'll never, I promise, regret it. Live out this God created identity the way our Father lives towards us, generously and graciously, even when we're at our worst. Our Father is kind. You be kind. Wow. We take the kindness of God and we extend that to others.
And the key here is not to do it expecting anything in return because that's not kindness. That's trading, isn't it? That's almost investing. We have a different example. Our father is kind. So you be kind. Jesus goes on when talking to the crowd of people, he goes on to say this, don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults, unless of course, you're not kind.
You want the same treatment. Ouch. Don't condemn those who are down. That hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people. You'll find life a lot easier. Give away your life. You'll [00:24:00] find life given back, but not merely given back. Given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting is the way. Generosity begets generosity.
Don't be mean to people. Don't jump all over them. I'm not telling you not to hold people to account. Because that's not what it's about. Behave in a way that benefits others. Be kind, which includes what you say, right? Who around you needs to hear a word, a kind word from you? Texting them is okay, but calling them is better.
I came across a study recently that found when young girls were under some form of stress, that stress would reduce when they hear a voice of someone they trusted. Like their mum. Not only did their stress go down, but their positivity actually went up, which is not, it's not to be unexpected, right? It makes an awful lot of sense, [00:25:00] but you know what?
That same study also found that if a mum sent a text message rather than actually spoke to them, The effect was not nearly as profound. What that means is this, voice is more powerful than text messages. So if someone, if you need to be kind to someone, if someone needs a kind word from you, be vocal about it.
Text messages are okay. But it's better for them to hear your voice. Calling takes an extra effort. Visiting that person takes even more effort, but that's the kindness of God in action, right? That's all it is. So talk with people. Look for opportunities to help others without expecting anything in return.
Offer a helping hand and be like the good Samaritan. What would happen if those that disagreed with each other in our society We're actually kind and helpful to each other at the same time, despite those differences, rather than just spouting hate. What a difference that would make. [00:26:00] We should be more Samaritan and less judgy.
Open the door for others. Just listen to them, send care packages, cook a meal, talk to the person who is serving you at the checkout, make them smile, make that a challenge, can I get this person in front of me to smile, yes or no? Take an interest, call a friend you haven't spoken to for a while, compliment everyone you meet with actual genuineness, not in a false kind of way, just be genuine.
Volunteer, donate, even pay for somebody's coffee or meal at a cafe. in a way that benefits others. There are so many ways to be kind and it just takes intentionality and the Holy Spirit working in you and through you. Just allow that to happen and go for it. So this week, I want to challenge you to designate a day as your kindness day.
Imagine a day wholly devoted to spreading kindness In every interaction that you have, every conversation, even with those you [00:27:00] find it hard to agree with, plan it out. What can you do? What can you say? Be intentional about it. See how it goes. But if I'm honest, I don't want it to just be a one off. If Thursday is your kindness day, do it every Thursday.
Build the habit of kindness. Because the impact will be extraordinary, extraordinary, because kindness will seep out of every area of your life and it won't just be Thursday, it'll be Wednesday and Tuesday and when we practice it and keep being intentional about it. Things can and will change in the world around us.
Remember, as the Bible tells us, those who are kind indeed benefit themselves. Kindness is one of the few things that really is a win. So let's make kindness our mission. What do you say? Choose your kindness day. Choose to be kind to everyone you meet that day. And even those of you who don't, share your stories with us, we'd love to hear them.
Remember, God our Father is kind, so [00:28:00] we get to choose to be kind too. So there you go, quick change of location.
Sharon Edmundson: You did that so well, so quickly.
Matt Edmundson: The boy's got talent.
Sharon Edmundson: Definitely.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, something like that. Welcome back to Conversation Street. Glad you could join us. Yes, I did the talk. For those of you who joined us during the talk, a warm welcome to you today, Sharon.
My beautiful wife and I are hosting, and I just happened to do the talk. Ordinarily, that doesn't happen. Normally, our scheduling's a little bit better than that. But on this occasion, we need Double
Sharon Edmundson: Matt. That's the phrase of the day. Double Matt.
Matt Edmundson: Double Matt. At least it's not triple. Yeah at least I'm not hosting and speaking.
That would be tricky, but nigh impossible, actually. Anyway, I digress. So what did you make to the talk? There are lots of things going on in the comments. I was watching that people dipping in and out on the old gram, people dipping in and out on the old [00:29:00] Facebook lots of comments going on.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, I think I had different reactions.
Part of me is just, lots of really lovely bits. And then there was quite a bit of owie bits. It's quite challenging, isn't it, as well? It's lovely on the one hand and the story you started with. I love hearing stories like that of these random acts of kindness. And I know Nicola put in the comments that she's done some, and I remember her talking about them in the past.
I can't quite remember what they are. So I was looking for some to come back in the comments. And it's always really, it's really cool to hear those things, I think. And they do, they can change your day, can't they? When someone's kind to you. Yeah. But then there is the owie. section where actually it can be a challenge being kind sometimes if you've got someone who you find very frustrating and you just want to tell them how you feel.
And of course sometimes it is appropriate to tell them how you feel, but it's what's our motivation and what's our tone and are we doing it out of kindness or is it pure frustration? Yes. That kind of [00:30:00] thing. Yes. So yeah, it's a challenge.
Matt Edmundson: Very much a big challenge, very much a big challenge.
So yes yeah. Peter said a good example of kindness is my sister back in the UK has recently had a cancerous cyst removed. A friend of mine here in Spain sent her flowers to celebrate the great news. She is unknown to my sister. Yeah,
Sharon Edmundson: that would be totally unexpected, wouldn't it? So that's got quite a big impact.
Yeah, she's really lovely.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, absolutely. But Peter, you should send flowers as well. I'm assuming Peter did actually. But yeah, it's great news about your sister as well, Peter. We've been praying for her. Good news that she's on the road to recovery, which is great. And that's actually, it's one of those things that one of the kindest things you can do for people is pray for 'em, right?
And to take that time aside and just to remember them before God in prayer, it's always a good place to start with people. I didn't even say that in the talk. What kind of a preacher am I?
Sharon Edmundson: It's hard to fit everything into 20 minutes, isn't it? It is
Matt Edmundson: yeah. Matt Crew says There's so much
Sharon Edmundson: that could be said.
Matt Edmundson: Matt Crew says you don't sound as fluey [00:31:00] compared to midweek. Yes, true. I'm pretty much healed now, which is a beautiful thing. You're doing much better, aren't you? Yeah, back to normal, which is nice. Yeah very nice. What else we got? Jenny's in the comments. Andy says, sounds like you've been listening to one too many podcasts, Matt.
Why'd you say that, Endy? Not that I'm offended at all, but I'm curious as to what you mean by that. So yeah interesting comments. Anyway, I digress from the comments. What were your notes? You took lots of notes. I didn't, I thought it was a bit weird if I took notes of my own talk.
I don't know, I just didn't.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, it just helps me to concentrate a bit and then to remember bits that stood out. I think apart from the story you started with, the first thing that stood out was about God's kindness repentance, because I think sometimes we can get the impression that God is just wanting us to do the right thing and almost is angry, Oh, you've messed up again, but it's showing like it, no, it's his [00:32:00] kindness that is wanting us to turn around.
It's not this angry God is just going. I guess it's the same when we look at someone we love, who's making decisions that we think are actually, or we can see that are really harmful. I think sometimes it's easier from the outside looking in to go, that's, that doesn't make sense, that's going to be harmful to your life and looking at them and just going, why are you doing that?
No, don't do that. Do this and it's not because you hate them. It is literally because you love them and you want good for them and you want their life to go. So I think that was the first thing that came out is God's kind. Yeah, and being God. I think he's surely he's got to be the kindest.
If you think of the kindest person that you've ever met, it's like God is way more kind than that. Yeah, he is the kindest being ever.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, that's very true. I like that. Yeah, I think it's an interesting one, isn't it? Because again, we're talking about wholeness. How do you become a whole person? I think part of that [00:33:00] journey is understanding that God is in fact kind towards you and towards everybody else.
And that in his kindness, he will bring about that wholeness. And part of that journey then is the outworking of kindness, the kindness of God through you, right? So he uses you and me to bring the cut his kindness to the world. And that's all part of the journey, isn't it? And that's where you start to go.
Wow, that is a bit. Yeah, but involved.
Sharon Edmundson: I see Dave, there's so many comments, I feel like we're not being able to pick up on them all. But I've just seen one from Dave saying, we have to be prepared to get involved with people like the Good Samaritan. That's part of the cost. Yeah. And I think, yeah, there is sometimes a cost to kindness, isn't there?
And I think with that Samaritan, it's like going into what is essentially an enemy village to find somewhere safe where this guy can be healed and recover. Actually, [00:34:00] that is a huge cost. Yeah. And that's not to say that we shouldn't look after our own needs as well. But I think sometimes we do need wisdom on where to step out and where we need to pay that cost and actually where sometimes we need to draw back.
That can be a fine line sometimes.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, that all comes down to boundaries, doesn't it? And understanding boundaries. And that's one of those things, we have such a fear, I think of being of burning out and quite rightly so to all being taken advantage of. But I always remember something they said at Bible school, which is always stuck with me, it's better to have a little wildfire than no fire at all.
In other words, I'd rather be taken advantage of a little bit, or maybe go you know, beyond my boundaries, maybe a little bit, then not enough, if that makes sense. But I'm not talking about being stupid or excessive, obviously
Sharon Edmundson: obviously in that story with the Good Samaritan, that was somebody who was completely helpless.
There was nothing he could do [00:35:00] to help himself. And yeah he actually, he needed somebody, which is very different to someone not being continuously not taking responsibility for their own life, isn't it, where yeah, different scenarios, different responses sometimes.
Matt Edmundson: They do. They do. And, but again, it sounds wonderful, doesn't it?
The kindness of God is extended to us and through us, but there can be a cost. To that, it's
Sharon Edmundson: not popular, is it?
Matt Edmundson: No, it's not popular. And it's not all sunshine and rainbows, either. It's not it's can't being kind is not always easy to do. And I think that's the whole point of it, isn't it?
Is it's not always straightforward. It's not always easy. Yeah. But you know that there is a cost and we do have to count that cost.
Sharon Edmundson: I think I've got, there's a comment from Matt Crew saying I've had people who've taken advantage of my kindness and then twisted the kindness into claiming its evilness.
It's hard to trust anyone else after your kindness has been [00:36:00] violated. Yeah, that can be tricky. Yeah, and we need to be wise with our kindness. But I think at the end of the day, it's like, who are we serving? And what do we expect from our kindness? I think that's something that helps me it's God that I'm serving not people.
So in a sense, how they react to that's not my responsibility. My responsibility before God is how am I, what's my actions? How am I thinking about people? How am I dealing with that? Cause it's hard when people are like that back, isn't it? You're just trying to be kind and it's getting misinterpreted.
That is, that's tricky. But yeah, I think for me, that would be how I'd help with that one.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. That's super wise. I think I said this in the talk that actually, if it's hard to model kindness, if you've never actually received kindness in any way, and we've all got our stories, and we've all got stories of when people have been unkind, as well as [00:37:00] when people have been kind, and we've all got those stories.
But like you say, fundamentally, kindness is a fruit of the spirit. If God is living in you, and you are a Christian, and you are on your journey to wholeness. Part of that deal, in some respects, whether we like it or whether we don't, we're going to have to extend the kindness of God out. And what we learned from Christ on the cross is actually, it's not always that well received, with the two guys, either side of him on the cross, one of them was criticizing him and mocking him.
The other guy was like no
Sharon Edmundson: he did it anyway.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Sharon Edmundson: And yeah, I think that brings back to the verse where it talks about the God, oh, it's stuff in Romans. I can't think of the exact quote where it talks about how Jesus died for us when we were his enemies. So even for people when we are mocking him, rejecting him, he still extends that gift to us and it's up to us what we do with it.
But he's constantly giving that kindness just [00:38:00] can't come back to me, but he's kind, but he's not controlling. So he gives us the choice of how we receive that, how we react to that. And yeah, it's the same, isn't it? We give out that kindness and Pete, some people are going to reject it. Some people are going to receive it, but it's for us to just, to say, Judy, give it out, isn't it?
Yeah. But I think it's a really good point about, it's about being connected to God and it's not just all this self effort stuff, but. If we're connected to God and constantly receiving his kindness, then it's easier to give from what you've got than try and give something that you've not got.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, that's super true.
Because I'm there's a guy was talking to you the day he was talking about how he was a kind person. But he was saying it in the context of something bad is going on in my life. Therefore, I don't deserve it because I was a kind person. Yeah, and I think that's very dangerous thinking.
Yeah very dangerous [00:39:00] thinking, because that's a case of I'm doing this stuff to earn some kind of position in life, which I think is not going to help you really in any way. And I think the other thing to think about here is actually, God is kind to you. But how God defines kindness, and how we understand kindness, might not be connected that well at various points, right?
And so I like the definition that kindness is mercy, that kindness is a benefit and is an action intended to benefit you. And so when God is kind to humanity, you don't always see the end from the beginning, but he does, and we have to trust that, right? And God being kind to you is not giving you everything you want or need.
Everything that your wishlist sort of thing.
Sharon Edmundson: And one of the things I think it's reminded me that I did the first talk on the Fruits of the Spirit about love and I've got my train of thought now. Oh, yeah, it was talking about how sometimes we can do things that look [00:40:00] loving.
So you can have two people do the same action that looks like love. So maybe make a meal for somebody who's having a hard time from one person, but the motivation can be completely different. So the motivation for one person might actually be love in that they've concerned about that person and they want to show them support and whatever the other person, it might be
the motivation is to make themselves look good or like that to get something back. Yeah. And there was an example, I gave the story of somebody who, when they first became a Christian, they had this just sense of God's love and how it was such a pure love. And I think that could be said with all of these fruits from God.
It's a pure kindness. Yeah. Out of purity. So that the inside matches the action. There's not this kind of separateness between them. [00:41:00] Yeah. Yeah. And I think that again, that's the difference when, if we're connected with God and receiving from him, we've got much more chance of giving out pure kindness rather than all this, wrong motives, right thing for the wrong reason.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah very true. So Nicola's put one of her stories in the comments. So I love this one. I once paid for a person behind me on the M6 toll. They caught up with her at the next service, in fact I'm going to put this in the broadcast. They caught up with me at the next services, super grateful I'm guessing because they had forgotten their money.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's great. I think that sounds quite fun, doesn't it? And that when you were talking in the talk about having a day where you have an acts of kindness day, like you say, this is something that in theory, should just be flowing out of us. But I did quite like the idea of having a focus for a day.
Yeah. And like developing a habit in a sense of, but it sounds quite fun, which I liked, not because sometimes things can be I don't [00:42:00] know, maybe I can make them like a bit of a task to do, but that can be like quite creative and, yeah, no, you totally can, about all these different things.
Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: No, I like the idea of it. And I've, it's not that Thursday is my kindness day, but that's the day where I think I have these little challenges. And I just remind myself have a little reminder, the sort of do the kindness thing, and it started to start to become a habit.
The main one is always now whenever I am my big thing, if I'm ever in the checkout at the supermarket, I really want to make the person at the checkout smile. That's my thing. I've got a thing now I'd like I want to talk to them and engage them in a way where they just, you know, Smile.
Sharon Edmundson: I'm intrigued now as to how you do that.
Matt Edmundson: Normally it involves a dad joke.
Sharon Edmundson: Is it a smile from enjoyment or a smile from please move on? I don't mind either way.
Matt Edmundson: So Andy says, Oh, you mentioned blood pressure, [00:43:00] cortisol levels in the talk, Enz Huberman coming. Okay. Yeah, no fair play.
Sharon Edmundson: It is interesting though, I that, when all the researchy stuff matches up with scripture.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. I was listening to actually the Human Podcast today, which is why I was smiling. I was walking around the park listening to one of his podcasts on sleep, which I thought was really interesting. Nicholas says, A few weeks ago I met a lady and her husband and she was trying to get a taxi just to go down the road.
Because he couldn't walk that far, so I save him seven quid and get my lift. Nice.
Sharon Edmundson: Cool.
Matt Edmundson: Nice. I think Nicola
Sharon Edmundson: is good at those little acts of kindness.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. No contest, but Nicola's winning right now.
Sharon Edmundson: She's putting the most stories in, definitely. But yes, you're winning, if it is a competition.
Matt Edmundson: Pete says the comment to speak rather than text is very valid.
Appreciate that. Text is black and white and can be read in whatever mood the receiver is in. The spoken word is far warmer. Yeah, it is. It's interesting, isn't it, [00:44:00] how the spoken word that I was really intrigued by this study that came out where they took two control groups young girls who were stressed with something.
I think it was to do with school. They were stressed with something and one control group, the parent, the mom, especially the mom would talk to her daughter. And in the other control group, the mom would text her daughter. And actually the one where she physically called her. was far more effective than just a text message.
Which is interesting in a world that just delights in sending text messages now, right?
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, sometimes it's more convenient. Yeah. You can read them back again, can't you? You can. But yeah, I think they're, the Bible again says that there's power in the tongue, doesn't it? Talks in the beginning of the Bible of how God created by speaking.
Yeah. And so you're like, I think there is a lot more power than we actually realize in when we speak.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, no, there is. And actually, this comes down [00:45:00] to your kindness challenge day as well. When you're out and about talking with people, one of the things that you can do to be kind, I think, is just to be encouraging and be kind with your words and say, nice things, flattering things, complimentary things.
False way, but in a genuine way about the person in front of you, because you just don't know what battles they've been fighting.
Sharon Edmundson: It makes so much difference as well. It reminds me of this week had the last couple of weeks, actually. So at work, we have quite a few students. I work with women teaching English to non English speakers and, There's a lot of problems going on for a lot of people.
So we try and help them and part of that involves connecting with different organizations. And the last couple of weeks I had to phone this one particular organization to do with housing. And the lady on the phone was so kind and helpful and I was shocked. It's a bit sad that I was shocked. I think because I've had so many phone calls where people haven't been so kind and helpful.
And at the end [00:46:00] she she said, Oh, I think it was a line that they have to say, Oh, how have I been today? Have I been helpful? I was like, you have been so helpful. so much. And then I actually wrote in and as a compliment thing on that. And you actually picked up on that, didn't you? And you were like
why have you not sent me any compliment emails? So I've been sending him compliment emails every day since. Every day. Maybe I should start doing, do you want voice notes now?
Matt Edmundson: Yeah no. No,
Sharon Edmundson: okay.
Matt Edmundson: No, Mona sends me voice notes. And I, here's the thing, right? I guess no one's done a study on voice notes.
Because I know we've gone back to this. It's nicer to talk to somebody than it is to send them a text. But I think voice notes are just all kinds of wrong.
Sharon Edmundson: But for some people that actually easier if you find that if you're dyslexic, and you can't read. Yeah. Anyway, I think we're wondering,
Matt Edmundson: I do appreciate that for some people I, if you're going to send me, I just like text me because I can read them.
I can scan them, if that makes sense. Whereas Mona, God [00:47:00] love her, whenever she sends me a voice mail, you know you've got to sit down, get a drink, notepad.
It works better for some people. It does. No, it does. It does. We are
Sharon Edmundson: very much off point. That's unlike
Matt Edmundson: us. So Matt says you can't do that when you use a self service checkout. Try and get yourself
Sharon Edmundson: to smile,
Matt Edmundson: yeah, talk to yourself, see how long it is for the security to come and take you away. But this is where I think, actually intentionally going and see somebody at the checkout.
I know the self service checkouts are easier and I know they're more convenient. But sometimes deliberately going and seeing somebody that can do that's doing the checkout for you. One, I think they're probably in fear of their job because the whole self service thing is taken over. But two, Go make them smile.
Just do that. Go and say, how's it? And it just doesn't have to be people at the checkout, obviously everywhere, you need to make people smile. Whoever you [00:48:00] meet. Nicola says having the dog with me helps as I've trained her to give hugs and sometimes that's all you need is a hug off a dog.
And he says totally agree, dog hugs are the best.
You should get a t shirt. Dog hugs given that kind of thing be really quite interesting. Yes. Anything else in your notes?
Sharon Edmundson: Oh there was the whole thing of kindness is not the avoidance of conflict, which again I think from my own point of view, I know in the past people have really challenged me about stuff in my life and I really didn't like it at the time.
Yeah. But actually it was the kindest thing they could have done because after I'd finished fuming and muttering under my breath and like being like, I was actually, I think they've got a point. And those are the moments that have actually turned things around in my life because they've been able to see things that have needed, genuinely needed [00:49:00] changing.
Yeah. Sometimes I think we can get I'm speaking for myself. I know I can get stuck in a rut and a bit blinkered where you just can't see your way out and it's always easier, I think, to see what somebody else is doing wrong, not necessarily wrong or where they just, if they shift stuff, life would go a whole lot better.
Yeah. And sometimes I think we can bat off those comments and be just like, Oh, you're just being horrible, but actually sometimes that can be out of kindness. Yeah. So I think it's worth listening and just. If we do get those comments just to go, okay, is this, does this person, is this person for me, if they are, is there anything in what they've said that actually I need to listen to and take note of because it could well change our lives and actually bring us to that place of wholeness.
Matt Edmundson: This comes back again to the kindness of God leads us to repentance or leads us to change, leads us to turn around. But kindness is not the avoidance of conflict, nor is it accepting it. [00:50:00] I don't think God accepts in us those things which he wants to change in us. If that makes sense.
Yeah. And sometimes we get comfortable in that. Sometimes that's our sin. Sometimes that's just our way of living. And God's I don't know, I think I want you out of that really. And so it's the kindness of God that brings about the repentance. And yeah that's where it gets tricky, because I think it's easy.
When you're in those situations, for me, it's easier to complain about other people than it is to look at myself and go, God, what are you saying here, and I've, I just have this simple check if I'm complaining about others more than I am praising and being thankful, there's a balance, which is, what is it?
It's out of balance, isn't it? Things which are, things are unchecked. I appreciate we go through seasons and that there are events and stuff that happen. But fundamentally Dave says, takes us back to the truth of power and life and death being in the tongue.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, definitely.
Matt Edmundson: Explain [00:51:00] that.
Sharon Edmundson: Yeah, I think it's picking up on what we said before about that our words are really powerful. And I know the effects on myself that if somebody is speaking kind words, it's almost if you've got a thirsty plant and you give it water, Yeah. A few hours later, it's revived. I've just done that with a plant today, which is why it's on my mind.
Words are like that, but words that have come out of hate or unkindness have the completely opposite effect and have the ability to crush us or crush our spirit. So yeah, we just really need to be careful with that. How we use our words.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, absolutely. I totally agree. Provide an update.
Oh, yeah, put that in the comments an update on what's going on with the WhatsApp number. WhatsApp number saga here at Crowd Church. Yeah, there's a saga. So we set up the WhatsApp number two years ago, and it was working fine. We got apps on our phone. So then whenever someone was texting Stephane, it'd come straight to my phone, which was a [00:52:00] beautiful thing.
But it stopped doing that a few months ago, just went, Yeah, I'm not doing that anymore. I'm just gonna die. And so for a few weeks, we had no WhatsApp number. Now we have got it working. But the WhatsApp doesn't go through to my phone, it goes through to the church mobile phone, for want of a better expression, which is not manned all the time.
So we do have a WhatsApp number, you can send stuff through to it, we promise we will respond to you. It may not be within that hour. That's all I'm saying. It may take a day sometimes or depend on when it is a day or two.
Sharon Edmundson: Okay, that's not too bad. I thought you're gonna say a month or two.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, no, should be within a few days.
The phone's actually on my desk in my office. So it's whenever I'm in my office, every couple days. So yeah, it is working. So if you do have any prayer requests, any stuff you want to send through to us, you can WhatsApp us. And we will respond, honestly, and you can also reach out to us via social media at Crowd Church, all through the website, crowd. church and also you can reach us by email and all that sort of good [00:53:00] stuff. Email actually is probably better than WhatsApp now, because it's just available on more devices, that's the update, Matt. I hope that clarifies it. Jenny yes, you can now start WhatsAppping me again, because why would you not want to send
Sharon Edmundson: it in all your compliments and your kind words as well as your requests.
Matt Edmundson: Jenny, what a legend. Wow. Edmo uses his office. Yeah. Thanks, Matt. Sometimes maybe a bit too much. Maybe
Sharon Edmundson: I'm not saying anything. I have seen that Matt's also asking about next week, Yeah, so yes, it is Will Sopwith talking about goodness,
Matt Edmundson: gracious, me,
Sharon Edmundson: what's it goodness? I wrote it down, but it's got lost in all my notes, I'm not sure where it is.
Matt Edmundson: Yes, it is in fact goodness, Will is talking to us next week about goodness come and join us next week as we carry on this wee journey through the fruits of the Spirit. We've got a couple more weeks on this. Cause there's goodness, there's [00:54:00] faithfulness. You're doing that talk. I think Dave's doing a talk.
I can't remember that. I think Dan Orange is doing self control. I can't remember the other fruit of the Spirit. I'm really sorry. Apparently I'm a church pastor and I can't remember all the fruits of the Spirit. Anyway after that we are then jumping into identity in Christ as we carry on this journey in spiritual health.
We're going to look at what it means to be in Christ Jesus and how life changing that teaching is.
Sharon Edmundson: Definitely changed my life.
Matt Edmundson: Yep. And mine too. So I'm very excited about that coming up. So got some cracking stuff coming up. Then over the summer in August, we're going to do the non live, just letting you know what's going on, really got the non live streams coming up.
We're going to get some Psalms out there in August. And then in September, we're going to start the next part of the whole thing.
We are going to start part two of the wholeness series. Part one is spiritual health. Part two is soul health, mind, will and emotions. We're going to get into all those kind of things September, October time as [00:55:00] well. So very excited about what's coming up. Some good topics, some meaty topics. Anyway, anything else from you as we wrap up today's service?
Sharon Edmundson: No, just thanks for joining us and for all your comments. Sorry we've not picked up on all of them. There were lots, so that's fab. Thanks.
Matt Edmundson: Yes, absolutely. So I'm just, I don't know why I'm looking at this. There's way too many comments, which is nice. I it's better to have too many than too little.
Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. So thank you so much for joining us here on Crowd Church. It's been great fun. Really enjoyed this conversation about kindness. Go do your kindness challenge day. Tell me what day of the week you're going to choose. You've got a few seconds. Write it in the comments.
Just pick a day which makes sense for you in the week. What's your kindness day going to be? And then start to plan it out. What can you do that brings about the kindness of God to other people? It doesn't have to be big. Nicola proved that dog hoax. Paying someone's toll on the M6. They don't even have to involve cash.
Just kind words, but [00:56:00] whatever it is, pick your kindness day and let us know your stories. I'm really intrigued. It's been, yeah, it's been great. So thank you so much for joining us. Have a fantastic week wherever you are in the world. That's it from me.
Sharon Edmundson: Goodbye.
Matt Edmundson: That was so slick.
Sharon Edmundson: I know, I haven't got anything else to say.
We were
Matt Edmundson: so professional. I'm out of words now. That's it, is that it? Yeah. Fair enough. All right, ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for joining us. God bless you, have a fantastic week. I'll see you next week. Bye for now. Thank you so much for joining us here on Crowd Church. Now if you are watching on YouTube make sure you hit the subscribe button as well as that little tiny bell notification to get notified the next time we are live.
And of course if you are listening to the podcast, the live stream podcast, make sure you also hit the follow button. Now. By smashing the like button on YouTube or writing a review on your podcast [00:57:00] platform, it helps us reach more people with the message that Jesus really does help us live a more meaningful and purposeful life.
So if you haven't done so already, be sure to check out our website, www. crowd. church, where you can learn more about us. As a church, more about the Christian faith and also how to connect into our church community. It has been awesome to connect with you and you are awesome. It's just a burden you have to bear and hopefully we'll see you next time.
That's it from us. God bless you. Bye for now.