#33 Emotional Resilience and How To Bounce Back Stronger

Sunday LivestreamBecoming Whole

29 Jun

Written By Dave Connolly

YouTube Video of the Church Service

Emotional Resilience and How To Bounce Back Stronger

Time Stamps

00:00:00 - Welcome and introduction to emotional resilience
00:03:00 - Talk begins: Dave explains what emotional resilience really means
00:05:40 - Paul's testimony of resilience in 2 Corinthians 4:8-9
00:10:00 - The treasure within clay jars - finding strength beyond ourselves
00:14:00 - Why acknowledging our struggles is essential for genuine resilience
00:19:00 - Conversation Street begins: Resilience and having a mission bigger than yourself
00:29:00 - Breaking free from the "performance gospel" - being honest about struggles

Emotional Resilience: Finding Strength in Your Brokenness

In a world that often feels determined to knock us down, how do we keep getting back up? That's the question at the heart of this week’s service at Crowd.

Dave took us through a powerful passage in 2 Corinthians 4, where Paul gives us perhaps the most honest account of what resilience looks like:

"We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed." (2 Corinthians 4:8-9)

Let's be honest, if this were Paul's sales pitch for Christianity, most of us would politely decline. Affliction, perplexity, persecution? Not exactly the carefree life we might hope for. But there's something authentic in Paul's words that speaks directly to our experience.

The Treasure in Clay Jars

The key to understanding this resilience isn't found in Paul's extraordinary willpower or some superhuman ability to endure suffering. It's found in the verse just before his list of hardships:

"We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us." (2 Corinthians 4:7)

God deliberately places his most precious treasure, the Holy Spirit, in ordinary, fragile containers. Not in titanium vaults or reinforced safes, but in everyday clay jars that have no inherent value.

"Nobody raves about a styrofoam cup or a brown paper bag," Dave pointed out, "but we're thankful they keep our coffee hot and stop us from burning our hands. They serve a purpose despite being easily tossed aside."

That's us – ordinary vessels carrying an extraordinary treasure. This completely transforms our understanding of resilience.

Resilience Isn't Denial

During Conversation Street, Matt discussed how resilience isn't about denying reality or pretending everything is fine when it isn't.

Too often, Christians feel pressure to mask their struggles, thinking that admitting difficulty somehow indicates a lack of faith. But as Matt reminded us, Abraham (the father of faith) fully recognised that "his body was as good as dead" – he acknowledged the reality of his situation while still believing God's promise.

True resilience acknowledges the mountain but trusts in the Mountain-Mover.

Matt shared how, during financial struggles, he once wrote down his exact financial situation on wallpaper and stuck it to his bedroom door. Why? Because facing the precise reality of his situation was better than the vague, undefined worry that was keeping him up at night.

When we define our problems clearly and bring God's truth into that space, our minds become clearer and our faith more focused.

Finding Mission Beyond Yourself

One of the most powerful insights from the evening was that Paul had "a mission bigger than himself", and this fuelled his resilience.

Dave agreed: "When you find that sense of purpose and you're just going about life, you see life differently... You're focused. So when resistance comes – because it will come – you realise you're not standing there with your own mandate. It's a mandate from God, and He's with you."

This doesn't mean we seek out hardship. As Dave clarified, Paul wasn't saying, "Someone please persecute me!" He was simply living out his calling and facing the inevitable opposition that came with it.

There's something about having a purpose greater than your own comfort that builds extraordinary resilience. Matt mentioned that his mum worked multiple jobs after his parents' divorce. She had a mission bigger than herself: to feed her family, which gave her the strength to keep going.

Breaking Free from Performance Christianity

Someone asked about the pressure to appear "fine" in church settings. Why is it so hard to be honest about our struggles?

Dave's response was spot on: "We need to do away with superficial, pizza-sized relationships... We need to get some depth about our relationships and find somebody, invest time."

Dan added that there's often a "performance gospel" in Christian circles – a pressure to maintain an outward image of having it all together. However, as several high-profile cases have demonstrated, attempting to maintain appearances while struggling internally can lead to disaster.

God isn't waiting for us to sort ourselves out before He'll meet us. As Dave put it: "He doesn't say, 'Sort yourself out and I'll meet you at the door.' He says He'll never leave us or abandon us."

Scars vs. Wounds

Matt asked about the difference between scars and wounds. Dave shared his own experience of having a skull fracture that showed up years later on an X-ray – a permanent mark that testified to past trauma but had healed.

"Scars don't hurt," Dave explained. "Wounds do because they're not healed. So don't settle for having a wound when God wants to heal that. When you have a scar, every time you look at it, think 'Thank you, Jesus.'"

Some Christians, Dave noted, are "healed in body but not in mind" – their physical wounds have closed, but emotionally they're still bleeding. God wants to heal every part of us.

Hope That Has Substance

As the conversation drew to a close, Matt made a point about biblical hope: "We almost have to redeem that word 'hope.' Because in the Bible, that word hope has substance. It is sure. It is certain."

He contrasted this with the way we often use the phrase "Don't get your hopes up" – perhaps the most anti-biblical advice possible! Biblical hope isn't wishful thinking; it's confident expectation based on who God is.

Worry operates in a similar way to hope, but with a negative focus. "If the energy we expend in worry was expended in hope, how different our lives would be."

The Bottom Line

Whether you're facing career setbacks, relationship breakdowns, health challenges, or just the daily grind that threatens to wear you down, the message is clear: your resilience doesn't depend on your strength.

You're not meant to be unbreakable. You're meant to be a clay jar – ordinary, fragile, and sometimes cracked – that carries an extraordinary treasure. And it's precisely in that weakness that God's power is made perfect.

That's emotional resilience that allows you to bounce back stronger. Not because you never fall, but because the One who lives in you always rises.

Want to dig deeper into what it means to be whole in every dimension of life? Join us next week as we begin a new series on body health – exploring what the Bible says about physical wellbeing beyond just diet and exercise.

See you Sunday at 6:30 pm in person or 7:00 pm online.

Emotional Resilience and How To Bounce Back Stronger
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Matt Edmundson: [00:00:00] Well, good evening. Welcome to Crowd Church. Great to be with you this evening. My name is Matt Edmundson, uh, one of the leaders here at Crowd and next to me is the beautiful, talented Dan Orange. I.
Dan Orange: Oh, beautiful.
Matt Edmundson: Thanks for addiction. Didn't, he didn't say anything about talented? No, that's, that's fine.
That's fine. And to my other side, is it equally beautifully? Uh, and talented. Dave Connolly.
Dave Connolly: I did wonder where you were going.
Matt Edmundson: You just never know. Anyway, a very warm welcome to you, uh, joining us here at Crowd. Um, Zoe, are we actually live? Yeah, we are. Sorry. Great to be with you. I just didn't see it on the screen, so I didn't know whether we were live or not.
Um, but yeah, it's great to be with you now this evening. Uh, we are talking about mental resilience, all things to do. With mental resilience. Yes, we are. I'm really looking forward to this. Mm-hmm. Uh, these, these are the kind of talks I really dig, uh, and [00:01:00] get into. Uh, so Dave's gonna be sharing a bit about that.
Then we're gonna have what we call Conversation Street, which is where we go through your questions and comments, um, and try and answer as many as we can, uh, and come up with a few questions and comments of our own, don't we? Yeah. On the way.
Dan Orange: We try,
Matt Edmundson: we try, we do our best. Mm-hmm. Uh, do say hi in the comments.
Let us know where you're watching from. It'd be great to see you in there. Um, I'm just gonna make sure I've got it up on my computer, which I now have, which is very good. AIDS in the comments. Alice is in the comments. Good evening everyone. Good evening. A good evening. Alice, great to be with you. Thank you so much for joining us on what can only be described in this building as a very hot day.
Yes,
Dan Orange: very. I like if there's any US people, they don't understand this, but very muggy. It's a very British word, isn't it? It's like warm. There is no wind. Yes, muggy.
Matt Edmundson: It's very, very muggy. 'cause we don't really do air conditioning, do we? No. In the uk. We just get hot. We just, for three days of the year, we just get hot and muggy and we're just like, yeah, it is what it [00:02:00] is.
Don't
Dave Connolly: complain about it.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. And we're very, very good at doing that. So is it muggy where you are? Let us know in the comments. Uh, or maybe it's just a Liverpool thing. Today is a muggy day. Uh, but yeah, great to be with you. So without further ado, let's hand over to the amazing Dave Cony. Let's listen to.
What he has to say. Like I say, as we're going through this evening, do write any thoughts, any stories you wanna share, any questions that you may have. You can write those in the comments. We would love to hear from them. Uh, ready for Conversation Street, uh, which will come after this.
Dave Connolly: Good to be with you all. Um, the title given to me, um, was emotional resilience and how to Bounce Back Stronger and, um. If you are a regular Crowd Church, um, this, I did a, um, a talk [00:03:00] just a few weeks ago, which is a bit similar to this. Um, so maybe God is just trying to help us. And, um, if you've got a Bible or access to a Bible, I'm mainly gonna be talking about, um, a portion of scripture found in two Corinthians chapter four, verses eight and nine.
Today's reading it challenges us. To remember that, that what's on the inside determines our response, determines our reactions to stuff that's happening on the outside of us. So let me read that again. What's on the inside determines our responses. And reactions to the outside forces, to those things that all go on, um, around us.
And it's probably important to say that, you know, um, lots of people think when you become a Christian, you do it [00:04:00] because you need a crutch. And if you've ever heard me speak, uh, on this, I'm like, yeah, I get that. I, yeah, I need one. Um. But when you read about the life of Paul, the Apostle Paul, you can see that being a Christian wasn't the easy route.
And, um, as a Christian, um, I'm sure the guys will raise, um, raise this, um, a little bit later. It's not easy being a Christian. And so we can talk about that. Let me, um, read to you, um, what Paul says in two Corinthians chapter four, verse eight and nine. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed, perplexed, but not despairing.
Persecuted, but not forsaken. Struck down, but not destroyed. So he's just saying this is. Where I am, this is what I am [00:05:00] going through. And I'm sure if you know, as, as you're listening to this, you're probably thinking, well, I wouldn't be whatever he's doing at this moment, you know this big Christian dude, um, the Apostle Paul, you'll probably thinking, I'm not gonna sign up for what he, he's offering 'cause I'm gonna read it again.
We are afflicted. Not, we might be, we are afflicted in every way, but we're not crushed. We're perplexed, but not despairing. We're persecuted but not forsaken. We're struck down, but not destroyed. Wow. That's a lot of outside stuff. Trying to take Paul out, trying to distract him, trying to influence him.
There's affliction. Perplexities persecution and people attempting just to take him out of it. Let me read another version of this. It's taken from the Living Bible. Not one of [00:06:00] my favorite versions, but it does capture this really well. It says, we are pressed on every side by troubles, but we're not crushed and broken.
We are perplexed because we don't know why things happen as they do. But we don't give up and quit. We are hunted down, but God never abandoned us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going based on these outside forces. Paul needs a miracle. I think Paul needs some intervention just to stay alive, just to stay in the game as it were.
I think it's true to say that most Christians would long to see God bring a major breakthrough in their lives, or you may call it a miracle in their lives. But having been a Christian for quite a while, my conclusion is [00:07:00] probably this. Most Christians don't wanna be put in a position or in a place will they ever need one.
They don't wanna ever be put in a uncomfortable place. Where they'd ever had to cry outer God for that breakthrough or that miracle. How in the world can Paul survive All these things. The Apostle Paul, don't forget, he lives through those two verses eight and nine, but he can only come through those two verses because of verse seven.
Listen to this. We are like common clay jaws. Carry this glorious treasure within us so that the extra no ordinary overflow of power will be seen as God not ours. You know? And even what Paul is saying, [00:08:00] that as all this stuff is going on, we need to realize that God is with us and that God is in us. Here it's talking about a jaw.
It's a clay, clay jaw. Um, it's a clay container. And yet what they used to do in these clay jaws, they were cheap. They weren't of any great value. It says they put their treasure. Just think about that. Putting your treasure in something that's of no value, something that is insignificance. So
the Holy Spirit dwells in us. That's the treasure that we have in us. I want to encourage you, you know, sometimes as we look at ourselves, we think, well, we are not much. We're not much at all. We're not earning great value. Nobody ever stops me wonderful, um, remarks about us, but [00:09:00] God puts his treasure. An ordinary clay jaws just like you and me.
Clay pots, you know nobody, you know those little, um, styrofoam cups, um, or a brown paper bag that we use lots, don't we today? Nobody says, you know, you, we all like our cup of coffee and, and none of us rave about those cups. But we're thankful that we've got them for keeping our coffee hot, hopefully, and to stop us from burning our hands.
They're not of any great value at all. They're just tossed aside, hopefully recycled, but easily tossed aside.
We contain something of God, the treasure of God that is the spirit of God. Don't get, don't get caught up on you. Get focused on the [00:10:00] treasure that is within you. When you capture the treasure and the understanding that's within you, it makes you think differently about you and about what you do and where you go and what happens to you.
That treasure is within us wherever we face. It's a treasure that is precious to God and it's on the inside of us. Sometimes you might say, well, is it hidden? The fact that it's still a treasure? You might not be having your best day today, but if you know the Lord Jesus, his treasure, his spirit is within you.
You may not be doing all the right things in the right order. As a Christian, you may be really struggling, but I want you to know the treasure of God is still within you. Treasures were put in ordinary jaws. Jaws that didn't come at any great cost or value, [00:11:00] but God chose to put his spirit in them.
When God has that treasure, he puts it in us. I just ordinary us read that in verse seven. Let's just pick out a couple of other wonderful things here. When I'm perplexed and I don't know, um, how to decide what I should be doing, or quite often, how am I going to get through this? I'm sure most of us can relate to that.
We make desperate decisions rather than focusing on the treasure of God is within us. Sometimes I think I've exhausted all my natural resources. Sometimes I treat God like the fourth emergency service rather than my first port of call. You know, I might be out of all the resources. [00:12:00] That I can see or know that I have.
But you know, the reality is I will never, ever be without God because he says in his word, and again, if you've ever heard me speak, I'm more likely than not, I've quoted the scripture that says, I'll never leave you or abandon you, and that's a truth.
I wanna encourage you to grab all the verses and when you are going through stuff and start to speak those verses as life over you. We must never confuse content and the container. Yeah, hear that. Don't get mixed up. Don't get your focus on, um, the container. Just that ordinary jaw keep your focus on um, the contents, the treasure.
It's not that, um, our vessel is indestructible. [00:13:00] It's not a safe, but it's seen as a safe place to put the treasure
by putting your treasure in our ordinary jaw. It's not gonna increase its value, but God says it's a safe place where he is investing himself. Where he's gonna keep his treasure in you. You know, we can't make, um, we can't make it in life without knowing the treasure of God, the spirit of God in us as we go about doing life.
What's on the inside determines the power. Of the outside elements, and if God is on the inside, it changes everything. It changes how we live and how we look at life. It doesn't mean that we don't go through troubles. If God is in me, then nothing can be [00:14:00] against me. That doesn't mean that things won't try and overcome me.
Paul had many troubles. Now you may think, well, you've just read them. Dave, let me just tell you some of the other things that. The Apostle Paul went through. They include physical hardships, dangers, emotional burdens. He faced numerous, um, imprisonments, numerous, I think it was 39, um, um, lashings. He'd been not numerous beatings, stoned as in stoning stone rock, stone as him shipwrecked Oh, and perilous journeys.
He endured hunger, theirs sleeplessness. He was exposed to the elements. He wa there was rubbers around him. He was hated by Jews and Gentiles alike. The religious people weren't that fond of him. The unreligious people weren't that fond of him. Life wasn't [00:15:00] easy. And then he had the privilege of just being a man who served the church.
And I wanna just, just draw us your close by reading some of these verses to you. Again,
we are afflicted in every way as you are going about your life today.
Afflictions will come,
but they will not crush you because God. Is in you and with you. You will be perplexed but not despairing. You won't be, you won't go from hope to hopelessness. There is always hope when God is present.
You may feel persecuted, you know, and sometimes we think we live in England as [00:16:00] Christians, we don't get persecuted and would really challenge that. You know, as a Christian in the UK today, it is very difficult. It is very challenging. You know, we are told, you know, we can't even stand on the streets and pray.
There have been numerous Christians, um, who have been arrested praying on the streets. We are told that we can't do street preaching. Many people have been arrested for preaching the gospel on the street. It's almost as if, if you have a, a different opinion and you dare to voice it, there is a challenge and that's okay.
There's nothing wrong. I don't mind people challenging me, but we've been given a message. It's a good news message. And we must be faithful in doing that, whether it's in private or whether it's out there on the street. I'm not talking about condemning, I'm not talking about judging. I'm talking about taking the good news of Jesus Christ, which is the only thing that will [00:17:00] bring about any real change in our communities, any real transformation in our communities.
But there's a cost if you want to. Be a Jesus follow. If you wanna carry the message, well then people will come back. People will say, you know, call us a whole host of names. You know what? Sticks and stones may, you know, they're not, they're not gonna really hate us. You know, sticks and stones may break hard bones, but words, no.
People, you know, many people don't. They'll take a stand over a football team or a political view and they'll stand there and they'll take all the rebuff that is coming their way, but not so brave when it's time to take a stand for Jesus. And that's, as you read the pause, like that's what he does. He takes a stand.
It's as he is just going about his everyday life. He's not seeking these out. He's not seeking this out. He's not saying somebody please persecute me. He's not doing that. [00:18:00] He's just taking his stand as somebody who loves the Lord Jesus. And he's aware that the message is so important. So we find what happens to him is that there is resistance.
You know, and we have to be wise. I listen. I would encourage you, don't get into arguments. Share your message with people who want to hear. Share the message of Jesus with people who want to hear it. Don't get into arguments, arguments. Sell them ever end well. But just be open to what God is doing. Realize if you're persecuted, you won't be forsaken.
If you're struck down, you won't be destroyed. God is with us eternally. God has put his treasure in you. God bless you.
Matt Edmundson: So welcome back to Conversation Street. Uh, so we are gonna [00:19:00] carry on the conversation with Dave and with Dan and myself, um, around what Dave was talking about. Um, any questions you've got, do put them in the comments, uh, below and they will hopefully come up on my screen in front of me. Um, but one of the things, Dave, that immediately struck me as you were talking, um, and you.
You think about Paul, the Apostle Paul and all that he went through, and so you know, the thinking about emotional resilience and how to bounce back stronger. The thing with Paul is he had a mission bigger than himself, didn't he?
Mm-hmm.
Matt Edmundson: And that's, as you were talking, that was the thing that was going in my head actually, when your mission is greater than you.
It somehow seems easier to be more mentally resilient, right? Mm-hmm. Because you are, you are fighting for a bigger cause, which is maybe why I think of my mom as well. Right? So when we were growing up, my parents got divorced and she was working two or three jobs just to put food on [00:20:00] the table. She had a mission that was bigger than her, so her mental resilience.
Had a much bigger capacity. Do you see what I mean? And there's something about that isn't there in this story. Yeah. That actually having a mission and a purpose and a direction from God that is bigger than you, something you can believe, something you can put faith in there there. There is naturally gonna be some.
Mental resilience, which is needed for that.
Dave Connolly: Mm-hmm.
Matt Edmundson: What do you think?
Dave Connolly: I think it comes outta a relationship with God. Mm-hmm. As, as all these things do. Um, I think, you know, when you, you get, you find that sense of purpose and you are just going about life, I think you see life differently and, and that you, you're just going to, you, you know who you are.
You know what? That God is doing something in you. And as you go about. Go about your life, um, whether you are speaking, whether it's saying what you're saying, what you're doing, and [00:21:00] you, you, you're focused.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dave Connolly: You're focused. So when resistance does come, 'cause it will come.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dave Connolly: You can guarantee that it will come to us.
But we, we are realize that we're not stood there, you know, with our own mandate. It's a mandate from God and he's with us.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dan Orange: Yeah. Any thought on this? And you, you talked about the treasure and it is that, isn't it? It's, it's amazing treasure. So it's, it's outside of our humble beings, our ness that we've got this treasure to, to give.
Yeah. Yeah.
Dave Connolly: I mean, none of us would put, you know, if we were God, you know, um. And, and you had something so precious. You know, you look around, you, you know, you look around all the Christians, we know, they, they may not be on our list of people.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. You
Dave Connolly: know, but God chooses those foolish things like us, like this ordinary plain clay jaw.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dave Connolly: And he puts [00:22:00] his treasure in that. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So what's that's saying is that anybody and everybody, God wants to put that in. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And you know, as we start that journey, we're not on our own.
Dan Orange: Mm-hmm. I think it makes me think of, um, David, when he came up against Goliath mm-hmm. That he just said, you know, yes, my, I'm not afraid of you.
You are big, but my god's bigger. Bigger, yeah. Yeah. Um, that, that, that message we've got and that who we've trust in.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dan Orange: Doesn't matter how, how weak we are, how, yeah, how feeble we are. Our God is as God is bigger and that's who we are. And how did he
Dave Connolly: know that, Dan? How did he know his God was bigger?
Dan Orange: I dunno how to answer that question.
Sorry. Wasn't wasn't in the Bino, was it? Yeah, sorry.
Dave Connolly: You know, I mean it was his, through his experience with God, wasn't it? 'cause he can say like, you know, he, he's seen his God work. Yes. He, he was some, it was the first time [00:23:00] he was he was a youth, wasn't he? Yeah. You know, and they can be a little bit, you know, but it, it wasn't just that.
Yeah. He knew his God.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah.
Dan Orange: Yeah. You know, relationship, like you said.
Dave Connolly: Yeah. Yeah. And he'd been trained.
Matt Edmundson: Well, it's interesting, isn't it? Because he, David talked about how he'd seen God deal with the bears and the walls while he was a shepherd. And so often in life actually, how we see God move in the day to day in our, what I would call our ordinary, um, you know, the stuff that we do on a, on a normal day-to-day basis for David, that was shepherding.
Well, actually that helps prepare us for these bigger events. Absolutely. Right. And um, they always used to say to me at Bible school, preparation time is never wasted time. And it just feels a little bit like that, doesn't it? With David, that actually his resilience, it, it wasn't like God just zapped him from the clouds with it.
Mm-hmm. His resilience was built up through his [00:24:00] day-to-day experiences with God and learning to see God move in his day-to-day activities. Yeah.
Dave Connolly: Yeah. And I think, you know, as you look at Paul, here's a man who people used to fear, you know, um, when he was going around sort of persecuting the church and then he has a personal counts with the Lord Jesus.
Mm-hmm. You know, and, and he would still have that reputation. Yeah. You know, but there was a cost for him, you know, so as he goes around now with this new message, you know, it's not his message that he is carrying. Yeah. So everything changes. But the message.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, yeah.
Dave Connolly: You know? Yeah,
Matt Edmundson: it does. And I, there's a wonderful talking about Paul.
There's this wonderful thing with Paul. Uh, you've touched on some of what he said, but there seems to be this apparent contradiction mm-hmm. When it comes to resilience with Paul, because Paul makes this comment in, um, two Corinthians chapter 12, verse nine. He says, um, God's power is [00:25:00] perfected. Yes. That's in weakness for when I'm weak.
Then, yes, I am strong. And you wouldn't, how do you become ly resilient? Why You just get weak. That's, yeah. It just, it is a really odd statement to make, doesn't it? I mean, when you've read the Bible a lot, Dave, over the years, what do you see when you read that?
Dave Connolly: Read it again for folks.
Matt Edmundson: So, uh, second Corinthians chapter 12, verse nine says, God's power is perfected in weakness for when I am weak, then I am strong,
Dave Connolly: because when I am weak.
I've used up all my resource. Yeah. Yeah. I've come to an end of myself, you know, and we need to live a little bit more in that place. Yeah. Yeah. Where we come to an end of our soul really quickly and we just draw in that and we know that nothing is wasted with God. You know, I find that in my trials. You know, in, in my tough times, I become really aware of my relationship with God, the depth of it, or the [00:26:00] strength of it, or the vulnerability of it.
Yeah. Yeah. And, um, and I, and, and I, I just think, you know, none of us say, sign me off for one tomorrow, God, but they come because you know, even people who don't know Jesus go through all these things. Yes.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. But they
Dave Connolly: don't have that treasure within them. Yeah, yeah. According to scripture, not me.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. Well it's true because resilience.
So we're talking about emotional resilience, mental resilience, bouncing back stronger. We confused that word, I think with reliance. Yeah. So to be emotionally resilient means to be emotionally reliant. Do you know what I mean? I'm reliant upon myself and therefore I am strong, which is why I think this Bible verse is fascinating.
Yeah, because it's all about your strength, your mental fortitude, and I think the thing that we learned from scripture is. If you have a mission bigger than yourself.
Dave Connolly: Yes.
Matt Edmundson: And if you focus on God rather than what you can or can't do, that's a really great place to build resilience from you. Yeah. Right. Um, because that's gonna help you deal with all the stuff in life.
Yeah. [00:27:00] Um, but you're right, it's, it is fascinating. It's in that place of weakness, it's in that acknowledgement of weakness that you see God's strength absolutely flourish. Yes. Um. And so, yeah, they're fascinating. Do you wanna throw anything on this?
Dan Orange: Yeah. You, you, you said, um, that sometimes we use guard as like the fourth emergency service, don't we?
And that, that's not a bad thing, that when we're stuck, we call to him. But if we had him as our first, we'd learn, be learning all the Yes. All the time. Learning to, to be resting, you know, and trusting him. In all that time and I wrote down. Yeah, we, like you said, are we prep prepared to be uncomfortable, to see miracles, to see, yeah, see change.
But yeah, thought that was great. We just want it. I do, you know, we want it easy. Mm-hmm. Most of the time. And then, then we've had it easy for a bit. We prepare just for a little. Dip. Yeah. But I'll be prepared for that harder time. For a longer, yeah, a [00:28:00] longer time.
Dave Connolly: And those difficult times do really do produce something in us.
I mean, if you've ever need it, you'll hear people say they've needed a physical miracle, for instance. And, um, that it hasn't apparently ha you know, happened. They haven had some supernatural intervention. Well as you, as they go through the process of surgery or medication or, or whatever treatment it is, and they will, you'll hear their story if you listen.
And what you'll hear is themselves, they'll say something like this, I knew God was with me every step of that way. You know? And, um, that is just, um, I think that is so wonderful. Of course, they wanted not to have to go through that stuff. Yeah. But they got a different type of miracle. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I think they, you know that, that's a, a great story.
Yeah. You know that of
Matt Edmundson: people. Yeah. No, it is, uh, um, a [00:29:00] question. What stops us from being honest about our struggles in church? Uh, how can we move past the I am Fine mask? Um, because again, I think people confuse that with resilience. Yeah. So resilience is not. Telling a lie about how you are. Mm-hmm. Right. Um, is having the ability to, to, to deal with how you are.
Um, do you, well, I guess the question is, uh, around that then, do you think it's easy not to be honest, in church, to, to feel like you have to wear some kind of performance mask in your Christianity?
Dave Connolly: Me? No,
Matt Edmundson: no. Generally, oh yeah. I mean, you're, you know, from a pastoral point of view,
Dave Connolly: I think I, I think, you know, in, you know, doing what I do, I think, you know, lots of people, they have a stage genre type of thing, but I'm pretty much annoying like this all the time.
Um, but I think we need to do away with superficial. Pizza size [00:30:00] relationship, you know, pizza, death. Yeah. Yeah. We need to get some depth about our relationships and find somebody, invest time. Yeah. And you, you might say, I'm busy. Well, well, you have what you have. If you don't make time, you, you, you can't have those relationships.
Find time. We have relationships with people. How, how long have I known you guys?
Matt Edmundson: Oh, long.
Dan Orange: A long time. Yeah. Are we while like a few decades, 32, you
Dave Connolly: know, and I don't see Dan as often, but I see my at least once a month, you know, and um, you know, you have to invest in those relationships. Yeah. You know, like, I remember you guys when you're single guys and now you're dads and whatever, you know, but it.
We, if you settle for superficial, you're being robbed. Yeah,
Dan Orange: yeah, yeah.
Dave Connolly: And churches can be just as superficial as outside those doors. Yeah. But you can change that as individuals. Yeah. Yeah. So whoever, whoever wrote that, go and find somebody you trust. Yeah. And start to invest.
Dan Orange: Yeah.
Dave Connolly: In [00:31:00] them. Yeah.
Dan Orange: The word that I keep hearing when you're talking is we often have this performance, it's like a performance gospel.
It's just this is like a stage. Yeah, and there's sometimes there's. A lot of the times, not that reality is that it's just, this is just a snapshot of life. You know, there's been stuff in the news this week in Christian circles about people that have had very, very high profile lives and behind it. Their lives were, it was a mess because they tried to keep up to that.
Yeah. That, that performance and didn't have those relationships, Dan? No. Yeah. See, I mean, got to have to be honest with people. You, people around you haven't you.
Dave Connolly: You say, what are you doing? Yeah. Exactly. Not for you to fall into some form of immorality or whatever.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. Yeah. It's an interesting one Alice has put here in the comments, and I I, I kind of on this topic, actually on this, this idea.
I feel like there's a feeling sometimes people have that I. Um, when X is going wrong, but if they [00:32:00] had more faith, they'd be okay. Mm-hmm. And so sometimes you kind of go, well, this is going on. I feel like this, I shouldn't feel like this because God is good, and whatever I ask for in his name, he'll give it to me and it's not happened, so therefore, fundamentally there's something wrong with me.
Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: And so I don't want to tell people how I'm feeling or what I'm doing because it, I, I don't look like I'm the Christian I'm supposed to be, which I think is what Alice is saying here.
Dave Connolly: Yeah. Alice, I think that's a. Great observation. I think, um, you know what happens if we are, whatever we are, whatever we're doing, God is with us.
Yeah. He doesn't say sort yourself up. Out and I'll meet you at the door. He says he'll never leave with us or abandon us, you know, and if we're, even if we're in the wrong place doing the wrong thing, he's still there with us. He's not saying good Gail, you know, good, good guy, you know, but he'll stand there like, you know, a loving heavenly father.
Um, but I do not like the idea that whenever Christians have a difficult time, they look. [00:33:00] Dealer. I'm not very good with him illustration, but if, if you remember Star Trek, he used to have a little button that depressed and he used to say, beam me up Scotty. There's so many Christians who lived their whole lives like that.
The moment any challenge or hardship come into their lives, they press that button. Get me outta this God. So what we have is a whole host of Christians who are very shallow and who have never known what it is to walk through really difficult times or even. The valley of the shadow of death. Mm-hmm.
Because God said, I'll be with you even there, you know? So that's a great observation. Mm-hmm.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, I think it's a really good one, a really powerful one because it, Christianity is not performance based religion. No. In the sense of, it doesn't matter what I do, I can't, I can't earn my. Salvation. It just, it is what it is.
I can't help the fact that God loves me and I can't help the fact that he likes me. It is a truth, right? Yeah. I can't help the fact that I'm his favorite. [00:34:00] Maybe that's not a truth, but let's not go there. Um, maybe, but he knows. Yeah, man is dodgy theology. But I, I, I think it's an interesting one, isn't it?
Because. Um, this emotional resilience is not a denial of the realities that we're in. Mm-hmm. And I think faith consequentially is not a denial of the realities that we're in when God was speaking with Abraham. Or Abraham as he was called back then and he said, I want you to change your name to I am the father of many nations.
I want you to change your name to Abraham. And the Bible says that he called those things that be not as though they were as though they are, right? So he, he was starting to confess with his name, the promises of God. Now his wife laughed at the promises of God. He laughed at the promises of God because he's like, I'm an old man.
My wife's an old woman. This is not gonna [00:35:00] happen. But you know, he changed his name anyway, and the Romans four throws some really interesting light in this. He says, Abra talking about Abraham. He recognized. That Abraham, sorry. Abraham recognized that his body was as good as debt. So Abraham understood the severity of the situation.
He understood the reality, but he believed God anyway. He did not deny reality. He did not deny the size of the mountain that he was facing. He totally acknowledged it. But acknowledge that the size of that was inconsequential to the size of God. Yes. Do you see what I mean? And I think resilience, and I think faith, those two topics aren't about denying something.
They're about acknowledging the size of the mountain, but the size of the God Yes. That is with you when facing that mountain. Does that make sense? It does. It's very good. Mm-hmm.
Dan Orange: Yeah. I like that he, that he. He acknowledged it was, yeah, [00:36:00] it was the situation. Sometimes it can be something's happening, but if I, if I don't think about it or that can't be right.
Mm-hmm. Because I'm here and I'm God's, but it's, no, this is the situation, God. Yes. Well that means I need your help even. Yeah. Even more. I've got to trust in you. Yeah. 'cause that's the situation. Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: It's a really interesting one, isn't it? And I. I'm a big fan of this when I was younger, um, which I appreciate, may feel like a long time ago now.
Um, and I used to have real bad debt issues. My mind would go crazy, right? Because I just, and it would play tricks on me, like it would tell me stuff that was untrue, but it would operate. The thoughts if you analyze them, were all very gray and not very defined. And so I wrote down my financial situation on the back of a piece of wallpaper and stuck it on my bedroom door so that when I woke up in the middle of the night and I was stressing about it, [00:37:00] I could actually see the genuine facts.
Yeah. Um, and I could define what's going on. And I think so often with things that we face in life, there is this. Worry and anxiety, which I'm not saying is a bad thing, but I'm oftentimes that worry that anxiety is very undefined.
Mm. It is
Matt Edmundson: very wooly. It is not clear. You just know that this is how you feel.
Yeah. But as soon as you start to define it and you bring in the truth of God's word into that, it's amazing how much more clear your mind becomes and how much more focused thing your faith is. Mm-hmm. Is that?
Dave Connolly: Yeah. And I think, you know, like worry and anxiety, I, I regard them as fruits, fruits of something else.
And um, so for me, I ask myself, what, why am I feeling anxious? I. What you know, and listen, stuff happens. And it's right for us to feel anxious, but not over anxious, you know? Um, and however we're feeling, we need to invite Christ into it. [00:38:00] We need to acknowledge what we're going through and we listen. We may not choose things happening like that we haven't signed off for.
We wouldn't necessarily choose, but we're there. And I think it's really important that we realize we need to acknowledge where we are and we need to, we're talking about being honest with him or the relationships. We need to be honest with God, and we need to start saying, Lord, thank you for your word.
You say, I'm not alone in this, that you are with me. I don't need to have faith. You know, it's not about my faith, it's knowing that I'm standing on your word. Yeah, you are way to me, that treasure that you place within me. I can stand on this. I don't know where this road is going. And roads can take us to some very dark places that we would never want to go down or we'd never want anybody.
We love to go down. It could be, you know, death of a child or loved one or something like that. It can be horrendous. But we're on that journey, but we're not alone. And somehow we [00:39:00] have to find the resilience of saying, we're. Yeah. Oh, you putting your trust. And we need to be good friends when we're walking with our friends who are going through some of these horrendous things, and we need to walk alongside 'em.
We need to be praying, and we need to be encouraging them. We need to be opening of God's word to them. Not just sitting back saying, well, you know, I'm here. We need more than that. Yeah. We need engagement. Yeah. And God wants to engage with us, you know, every challenge. Is a testimony as we walk through it because you know, people who don't know God walk through very similar things.
And as we are going through some of this tough stuff, it should give us compassion as we see other people, not judgment. Yeah. Too many times we look up people, we see judgment rather than compassion and we'll walk through it, we know the pain and sometimes there's opportunity for us to say, folks, you know, I can say I've been through something.
Similar to this, and I [00:40:00] want you to know as painful as it is, God is with you. Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: I want to, um, ask you Dave and also Dan. I remember I was praying for somebody once, uh, and I just felt God giving me a word for that person. If you're new to the Christian faith and what that means. I just felt like God gave me a message for that person.
Um, and as I was praying, I. I was just reminded of how when Christ in his glorified body said risen from the dead, um, he goes to Thomas and he says, touch the scars. Right? Um, and I remember saying to this lady, I said, I feel like God is saying to you, you've had a miracle. You've had your healing. Mm-hmm.
But there's some scars and. It's almost like they were a badge of honor for them. Do you know what I mean? Like there's something that they were holding onto and I don't know, [00:41:00] I've not really thought about it since that moment, whether there's any theological depth here. But I figure, you know, with your experience, Dave, you, you will have seen this.
Just what are your thoughts on this idea that God can do a work in us, but sometimes we carry scars and just need to
Dave Connolly: Absolutely. I am. Or a number of years ago. Um, I look fairly normal and, um, but I got hit over the head with a metal chair and I've got a very large fractured skull. And, um, it was a long time ago.
I think it was in my twenties. And, um, then about what, maybe 25 years ago? Um. You know, and a number of years after I was in a car crashing, I had to go to the hospital and I had to have an x-ray. I'm like, I'm fine. Get away from me. And I walked out to the x-ray department and the next thing, the x-ray pass on came running after me saying, stop, don't walk.
You've got a massive fracture in your head. And I'm like, [00:42:00] yes, it's like 20 years old. And he was very concerned about it. And, um. Yes, there was. It was stable, you know, type of thing. Um, but I think in life that, you know, we go through stuff and God can bring healing, you know, and it can leave you with a score.
Some people are living with wounds still as Christians, and God wants to heal those things. Yeah. So yet it's, the score is a reminder of God's faithfulness. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You know, scars don't hear so, shouldn't hear wounds do 'cause they're not heal. Mm-hmm. So don't settle for having a wound. When God, you know, wants to heal that open, you've got a score and every time you look at it, think, thank you Jesus.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does that answer? Yeah,
Matt Edmundson: yeah. No,
Dan Orange: that's good. Any thoughts on this? No, I like that. I think, um, there's two reactions, isn't there? Is that reaction of that scar. Thank you Jesus. Mm-hmm. There's also that erection of, I know I've seen in people where it's. [00:43:00] Oh those days. And it takes them back to that.
Yeah. Rather than that. Thank you, God, that's what you did in me. Yeah. Yeah. They're
Dave Connolly: healed in the body. Yeah. But not on the mind. Yeah. Yeah. You know, in the, in their emotion. I think, you know, and you know, sometimes when you have wounds, 'cause they're horrendous things.
Dan Orange: Yeah.
Dave Connolly: And that happen, you know, maybe, you know, you're being attacked or something like that and you've got a wound.
But you know, God doesn't just want to heal your body. He wants to heal every part of you. Yeah. You know, we're not. Yeah. And, and that's available to everybody who's watching this same broadcast.
Matt Edmundson: Well, that's why, I mean, we're doing this whole series on wholeness. Nothing missing, nothing broken. Right. To actually become a whole person.
Absolutely. I think we're on week 33. Um, and I've, I started to put the notes together for the, did you see the notes that I put through for the relationship aspect? There's like 33 weeks worth of notes right there. And so I'm like, Hmm, this could be a series that goes on for a long time. So, um. But yeah, that, that whole aspect of actually God wants us to [00:44:00] be whole people.
Mm-hmm. Um, and wholeness, nothing missing, nothing broken. This idea of salvation, um, being this sort of all encompassing word, the Greek word is zoso. Yeah. Which I just think is a great phrase. Do you know what I mean? And it is this all encompassing word that. Means everything top to bottom, complete whole.
Mm-hmm.
Matt Edmundson: Will we get there? This side of heaven? I don't know. Am I going after it? Yes. Will I be whole when I get to heaven? Absolutely. Mm-hmm. Um, and I think sometimes we have to think in both dimensions. Yes. Do you know what I mean? That whole, we limit everything to what's gonna happen between, you know, the, the years I'm alive on earth.
But there is an eternity to think about. And actually we all talked about hope a few weeks ago, and I think Hope actually has a really strong role in this whole idea of emotional resilient, to be emotionally resilient when things are going wrong. Because we do have a mission bigger than ourselves. We have a [00:45:00] calling bigger than ourselves, and that has eternal consequence.
Mm-hmm. It's quite Russell Crowe, what we do now, echoes in eternity. Um, but it's that, that whole aspect, isn't it? Yeah. Thinking beyond just the pain of today, but actually the hope of this future, this eternity that we have. Mm-hmm. Where every. Sickness is healed, every bone is restored. Everyone's running down the streets sliding on those golden streets in their socks.
Do you know what I mean? Where there's no tear, there's no pain. Yeah. And there's joy and there's happiness and, um, I, I, I'm starting to preach myself happy a little bit here, but Yeah.
Dave Connolly: And so much of that is available now, you know, and but it's measured, isn't it? You know, like, I think we have to. We almost have to redeem that word hope.
Yeah. Because in the Bible, that word hope it has substance. Yeah. Yeah. It is. Sure. It is certain. Yeah. And [00:46:00] I think if you're not from Liverpool, you might understand my accent when, when I say this, but it's not hope. So. Hope. Yeah. You know, it's, it's a hope that is Sure. And certain you can be sure and certain that if you put your hope in God.
You can be sure and certain that he will embrace you and draw you to himself, not because of anything you or I can do, but because he is faithful to his word, you can depend on him. 'cause he's sure and certain, like his word, it's sure and certain it has substance. It's not, it's not some fluffy thing.
Mm-hmm. You know, and you hear so many people talk about hope. Well maybe it's a, maybe could be. Should be. Yeah. I'm like, dunno what Bible you're reading. It's not the Bible Jesus gave us.
Matt Edmundson: No, what the one Corinthians 13, the very famous passage on love ends by saying, now abides these three faith, hope and love.
Right? Mm-hmm. We talk a lot about faith in church. We talk an awful lot about [00:47:00] love. Um, but hope's a different story. We rarely talk about, and we Yes, I think you're right. We have to redeem phrases like, don't get your hopes up. Yeah. I mean, it's the most anti-biblical phrase ever because it's like, no, dude, get your hope sky.
High in God. You know, take it as high as you possibly can. Yeah. Because it is a force and our
Dave Connolly: trust is in, in us.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. Yeah. It's in him. Yeah. And that's where I hope, that's why hope is the anchor of soul. Do check out Will's talk. It was really good. Yeah. Um, but I think, I think if I, it's not always this straightforward to say, well, fear is the opposite of faith.
Hate is the opposite of love, and worry is the opposite of hope. So worry is the. Evil manifestation, if you like, of hope. So how you worry is how you would hope, but you would change what it is you are dreaming about and what your, what possibilities is you are thinking about. Um, and it's interesting, isn't it?
How they have fear operates in a similar way to faith and how [00:48:00] worry operates in a similar way to hope. And the Bible is constantly saying, don't worry because we have this hope. Not that, you know, I'm, I'm not trying to condemn anybody, but I'm just trying to say if the energy, we expend worry and we expended in hope, how much different allies would be.
Dave Connolly: And it's unbelief is the opposite of hope really, isn't it? You know, because. We get caught. So it's not happening. It's not, the hope is not in us and we can't add one iota to it by doing all the right things, saying all the right things, being the right person, et cetera. It's already done for us.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, super powerful. Uh, listen, thank you for joining us in Conversation Street. Uh, any final thoughts, any final questions? Put them in the comments now, 'cause I'm gonna be drawing conversation to a close very, very shortly. Um, but yeah. Dan, any any thoughts, uh, from you?
Dan Orange: No, I, I think everything we keep talking about comes back to this identity thing that our [00:49:00] hope if, if our hope.
It is in, is in us. If everything is about us, we miss out on Jesus. And if our treasure is Jesus, as our hope is Jesus, then it changes Everything. Changes our perspective. Changes our answer.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah,
Dan Orange: yeah,
Dave Connolly: yeah, absolutely.
Matt Edmundson: No. Great. Any, any closing comments from you?
Dave Connolly: I would just say on the jaw. I can just picture this jaw.
It's not anything of any great value. Just like us. It, it's insignificant in many ways. Yet God chooses to put his treasure mm-hmm. In people like you and me, so check him out.
Matt Edmundson: Yeah. Definitely, definitely do that. Uh, so we're gonna close Conversation Street there. Now, next week we are carrying on our conversation about wholeness.
We are switching tacks slightly. So, um, we have been looking at spiritual wholeness. We have been looking at what soul health means. We've been looking at the mind, the will and the emotions. [00:50:00] Uh, and we've just sort of brought it all together. Uh, uh, the whole soul thing. Next week we're gonna look at body.
And what does that mean? And it's more than just going to the gym and eating right, although that might actually be part of it. But, uh, we're gonna be looking at what the Bible says about the body. Um, I'm kicking that off next week. Uh, we've got Jen coming. She's talking about healing and specifically also about what happens when.
You don't get healed. What does that mean? Um, and looking at that whole side of things, uh, we've got Mike Harris, who was on Crowd a while ago. I'm really excited about Mike coming back. Um, an ex-professional football player.
Yeah.
Matt Edmundson: Uh, what a legend Mike is. Uh, and he's talking to us, I think about exercise and nutrition.
Um, and we've also, I'm talking about nutrition. You are talking about nutrition. Yeah. So he's talking about the other one, which I can't remember, uh, which I think [00:51:00] is sleep. Anyway, uh, we've, yeah, it's gonna be great, but yes, let's move on quick. Anyway, Mike's talking and he's gonna be good. Uh, so we've got four great talks coming up before we hit August.
Now, let me give you a heads up about what happens in August, especially if you're new to Crowd. Just so it's not a surprise. Uh, in August we do something called the non-live livestream, and we should really get a better name for it than the non-live livestream. Um, that's just what it's been called from day one.
It's like the default. Basically, we're gonna record some talks. Um, and we will set them as though they are being live streamed, but they're not because, um, we like to practice what we preach and take in Sabbath and take in rest. We, the whole team takes August just to be with family. Um, and so we do put content out.
But it's not technically live. You can still comment on stuff and there'll be people in the comments as well, but we don't have the hosts. Um, and we do that throughout all of August and it's just a great time just to be, uh, [00:52:00] together to rest up, to be with family. And this August we are talking about festivals.
And the reason we wanted to do this was because, um, August, certainly in the UK is the month everybody tries to go away on holiday. And so we wanted to look at this idea of going away on holiday from a biblical point of view. And the Bible doesn't use a phrase going away on holiday, but it has a bunch of festivals in there, all with very specific purposes, all something that we can learn from.
And so we're gonna deep dive on those. I think you're doing one of them. Yes I am. Did were you aware of this?
Dan Orange: I was aware I was doing one, but I dunno what I'm talking on. Yes.
Matt Edmundson: Love that. Uh, so yeah, so we've got that coming up. So, uh, for the next four weeks we're gonna be looking at body health. After that we are gonna get into the August series, which is all about, uh, how to holiday write. Then in September we're gonna. Start on the [00:53:00] whole relationship health side of things. What does it mean to have whole relationships?
So we're gonna be looking at things like relationship with God, relationship with each other. You know, what does a husband look like? What does it mean to be a wife? What does it mean to be a son, a father, a brother, a sister dating singleness. Um. Work relationships. I mean, this is why there's a lot in the notes.
We're trying to cover all these different relationships and what they mean. So we're gonna get into that, which I'm really looking forward to, which will take us up till Christmas and then into the new year. So that's what's coming up. Just keep you ahead of things on Crowd. Um, but yeah, I'm just looking at the comments.
No further questions in the comments. Um, so unless there's anything else from you two fine. Folks? No, I'm
Dave Connolly: good.
Matt Edmundson: All good. So we're gonna end the live stream there. If you are hanging around afterwards, do come join us in the Google Meet. Um, that will be, and in fact, I can see it now. It's in the comments, the link.
Go Crowd Church slash meet. Um, come say, how's it, [00:54:00] uh, one of us or both, a few of us will be, uh, on the Google meet. Come and say hello. It'd be great to meet you, uh, face to face and have a little conversation. So if you'd like to come join us in that, that'll be up and running in about two minutes time once we've ended this.
Uh, and we can get it turned on. So it'd be great to see you in there. If not, have a phenomenal week. Wherever you are in the world, we will see you next week. Um, yeah, that's it from us. God bless you. Bye for [00:55:00] now.